The pain never goes away

Thursday, June 8th, 1995
I went to bed with my dear husband not knowing it would be the last time
I’d lay down beside him & the last time I’d ever see him.
3 days later a detective would  knock on my door with news
that his body had been found.
This NEVER gets easier
The pain NEVER goes away.
If I had only  known,
if I could go back,
I’d hold you closer,
I’d hold you tighter,
I’d hold you longer,
I’d never let you go

It’s no longer new
but it hurts just as bad
It’s no longer fresh
but I’m still so sad


It will get better
that’s what everyone said
And I’ve been waiting
but tears I still shed


A deep sorrow remains
though time has moved on
I grieve and I miss you
because….. you’re still gone!


Do the tears ever stop?
Does the sadness ever end?
How can a broken heart
go on beating, but  never mend?


The hurt continues on.
Pain like  lava flows.
Words can not explain it.
No one can ever know.


Unless you’ve lived though it.
Unless you’ve been left behind.
You can never understand,
intense sorrow of this kind.


You’ll never be the same.
You’ll always wonder why.
And as time moves on around you,
a million tears you’ll have left to cry.


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